What’s in a name, anyway?

“You, of all people should have used
The correct spelling of your name.”

And you could only smile, wryly
For phone conversations can only last thus long.

Venflon stuck to my vein,
Tears flowed endless on our cheeks
As he told me the story of how he was called to be
As I recounted mine, in that Emmanuel Hospital so many years ago.

He said, “Sometimes the Lord speaks
To His chosen people,
And gives them insight
So that names have meanings for His calling.”

I bear the name, the blessing of God
For of the many names brought forth
Great-uncle thought befitting of me
Not just to be his namesake,
But because my parents waited
Five long years to have a child.

But why I chose to be “Somte”
Replacing our native “aw” for “o”
Is a different story
Which began, when as a teenager
All you wanted was to fit in among
Peers who were prone to dismiss you.

And being in a culture so diverse
And languages so different
Your name was prone to misspelling
“Sawmi” as “Swami”-
And each syllable of your name
Pronounced to bear different meanings:
“Laal” for the colour red
“Maal” for an article, but has sexual connotations
“Swami” for addressing the yogi or the husband.

And to say, “Hi, I’m Somte,” seems to be
Easier, even though still different
From saying, “Hi, I’m Chanda/ Meena/ Neetu”
Rather than saying, “Hi, I’m Lalmalsawmi.”

Much easier, or so I thought, to type
Somte Ralte
In my Orkut and fb accounts,
Though some friends still search to find
Lalamswamte Raltei.

Then, and maybe till now, I have never
Felt the need to assert my cultural identity
Through the correct spelling of my name
Or one without.
For I believe, despite the “aw” or “o”
Or the feminine indicator “i” behind the name*
I still am a Mizo, and proud to be so
My only fear is I would not live up to my name.

*Common names may be shared by both genders in Mizo society which
is made distinguishable by the “-a” suffix that indicates male and
“-i” suffix that indicates female.

** Previously published in “Hilltalk: Collected Writings from Mizoram: (2017) and my first poetry book, “Wild Hearts” (2019)